Young Girls & Old Men?!

[Kikiloveyou]

On a side note I do think Emma Watson is hot xD

[Dutchie]

Well what I think is that younger girls most of the time want older boys, and older boys want younger girls... and in my opinion age doesn't really matter... I had something with a boy who was 19 and I was 15 and we had much fun together.. and a friend (she's 16) has a boyfriend who is currently 23, they look very cute together so I don't mind, and I don't think he's a perv..

[cool]

I am almost done reading this Fantasy Trilogy called the Obsidian Trilogy recommended by The Zorya (quite good), and there was this extreme example of the ultimate age differences.. A girl and an ELF hooking up.. haha. .that's like a super duper huge age gap.. an elf lived till 1000 years and the human girl, ie, all humans live at most like 100, so, in ELF society, it'll be like a 95 year old guy dating a 5 year old girl.

But i guees the comparison is not that simple, cause the girl in the book is already in her twenties and matured enough, not a girl, but then again, the age gap is so huge, I wonder if in real life they would have any real mental similarities. But since it's just fantasy, anything can happen.

[Dutchie]

^
haha it would be funny if it was real life, I can imagine that they can have a conversation like this:

g:Why don't you just help me doing the dishes
B: *sigh* I remember the good times back in 1800 when my girlfriend/wife/mother did everything for me
g: but that is history!! now you just can help me doing the dishes

yeah that would be funny

[cool]

Hahahha.. that's so funny.. also, you're right, men don't do dishes and that drives women nuts! hahaha.. we guys are the ultimate laziness.. without women, we'll be living in a pig sty! (but I am pretty clean myself, not so a lot of my guy friends)

[pinkhaireddreamboy]

To elaborate on my earlier opinions:
There are a lot of girls at my school who are 14-15 years old and dating guys in their 20s and in that situation, I feel like the guy is taking advantage of a younger, naive girl. The girl is thinking "Oooh, he is so much more mature than high school boys!" and that it makes them cool to be dating someone college-age. While the guy (who usually already has a girlfriend his age) is basically thinking about how easy it is to have sex with them and eventually breaks their heart. It is different when they are actually "in love" and faithful to eachother, but in the relationships that I've seen it is hardly ever the case..

As for older women + younger men vs. older men + younger women issue, I think it is different because men are universally (?) perceived to be the dominate/overbearing partner and have much higher sex drives, testosterone levels, and all that guy stuff. When a man is so much older than the woman, I think things would tend to get unbalanced in the relationship and the woman would become too submissive and obedient to the man. While with older women and younger men, the woman, even though she's older, would be placed more in a place of empowerment, but would not necessarily become "threatening" to the younger guy. I don't want to generalize because I know that this isn't always the case, and might not even be the case at all. I'm just trying to look at it logically; I'm obviously not an expert or have studied this...

I understand that men are naturally 'perverted' I guess, but I don't think they have to act out or voice their feelings. They should have learned enough self-control by that time. I am open to a lot of things, but for some reason, things like 40 year old guys or older hitting on teenagers or women in their early twenties is just wrong to me : / I think it is because I just do not trust men at all, haha.

[cool]

Originally Posted by pinkhaireddreamboy

To elaborate on my earlier opinions:
There are a lot of girls at my school who are 14-15 years old and dating guys in their 20s and in that situation, I feel like the guy is taking advantage of a younger, naive girl. The girl is thinking "Oooh, he is so much more mature than high school boys!" and that it makes them cool to be dating someone college-age. While the guy (who usually already has a girlfriend his age) is basically thinking about how easy it is to have sex with them and eventually breaks their heart. It is different when they are actually "in love" and faithful to eachother, but in the relationships that I've seen it is hardly ever the case..

I have to agree that older guys or guys in general are really thinking about sex most of the time.. testosterone and all that.. and that when an older man like, over 25 dating a teenage girl, he probably knows it's not for love (cause how can a teenage girl work out? she's gotta go to college and will prob meet someone there later.. ), he's just doing it to have sex with the girl then later either gets dumped or dumps the girl.. (but think about this, if you are a guy and dating a willing young girl, would you dump her? haha.. chances are the girl will do the dumping)

I leave the moral part open though,.... cause if you truly want to look at it logically, here's how you would break down this issue:

Here are all the possible premises:

1. Girl is underage, ie, illegal (so it's may or may not be immoral, but society says it's a crime)
2. Girl is young, but NOT illegal (depending on age and country)
2. Girl willingly dates older guy
3. Guy is doing it just for sex (this is for sure, 99% of the time)
4. Girl is naive (depends on girls' upbringing)
5. Girl is NOT naive (depends on girls' upbringing)
6. Sex without love is wrong (girl's definition)
7. Sex for sex sake is ok (guy's definition)
8. Guy is just using the girl for sex with no intention of a long term relationship
9. Girl is just using guy for other reasons cause she also knows there's no long term relationship possible.

That's not the whole list, but if you're open minded enough, you'll see that you can combine any of those premises and 'logically' arrive at almost any conclusion. IT all depends on which premise you agree with.

For example, is sex for sex's sake evil or good? Who says what?

Or, Is the girl naive? If she is, it it the guy's fault or society's fault for not teaching the girl about guys and their testosterones?

or, just play with it with all kinds of combinations..

Again, I leave the moral outcome to the individuals and it's own cultures and society. One evil in one society may not translate to another.

(Disclaimer, please don't think that just because I don't put a moral meter on this issue, that i am a perv, cause I totally think it's more trouble than it's worth to date a girl that young.... remember, girls can give a guy a huge emotional wallop too... )

As for older women + younger men vs. older men + younger women issue, I think it is different because men are universally (?) perceived to be the dominate/overbearing partner and have much higher sex drives, testosterone levels, and all that guy stuff.

Hahahha.. tell that to my friend. I think he's the mouse in the house and his wife is the tiger. If you ask women this issue, then yes, men are all jerks, and if you ask this to a man, then yes, women are always trying to 'control us'.. hahah.. again, it's all perspective.

But it's fun.. take the logic exercise, puts down all the premises and ask yourself which ones you believe in, and then go further, which ones are real and not just because you believe in them.. look at real stats.. also, you brought in sex and testosterone.. that means your premise is that sex is already a negative connotation... ie, bad.. (so, in effect, because guys have a higher sex drive, then necessarily they are evil, cause sex is evil, see what I mean?)

When a man is so much older than the woman, I think things would tend to get unbalanced in the relationship and the woman would become too submissive and obedient to the man.

Actually, I think an older man will be more tolerant and patient and loving to a much younger woman (cause, the man has gone thru life a lot and now believes he's lucky to be with such a young beautiful girl).. I have known a lot of couples who are in that scenario.. ie, my own sister's husband is 10 years older than her and he treats her really, really well.. although i must say my sister is the controlling one and he lets her control him.. (cause maybe he feels lucky to be just with my sis).. and it's also true for another friend of mine who's a german guy married to an chinese girl 20 years his junior.. they seem to work out quite well.. i know his wife, and she's quite happy.. and my own cousin married a guy who's divorced and 20 years older than her, and althoug everyone was against it, including her mom, thinking that she only married him for his money, they seem to be quite happy...

But those are my own personal experiences.. I dont want to generalize based on my own experiences.. but it'll be nice to actually find out the actual stats on older men and younger women... are they more successful in marriage?

Let's leave it open cause we both prob dont' know yet.. haha..

While with older women and younger men, the woman, even though she's older, would be placed more in a place of empowerment, but would not necessarily become "threatening" to the younger guy. I don't want to generalize because I know that this isn't always the case, and might not even be the case at all. I'm just trying to look at it logically; I'm obviously not an expert or have studied this...

When you say 'threatening', i take it you mean sexually.. again, it goes back to the premise that 'sex is inherently evil', preached to us since we are young....

I understand that men are naturally 'perverted' I guess, but I don't think they have to act out or voice their feelings. They should have learned enough self-control by that time. I am open to a lot of things, but for some reason, things like 40 year old guys or older hitting on teenagers or women in their early twenties is just wrong to me : / I think it is because I just do not trust men at all, haha.

Hahaha.. totally agreed on this point! We guys are all pervs, when it comes to sex.. we lie, we cheat, we'll do anything for it... we're like bugs being controlled by this thing called 'testosterone'...

Incidentally, you mentioned 40 year old guys.. haha.. it's funny.. cause, did you know that right about 40 or so, women starts to have a higher sex drive than men? Watch out, school boys, watch out for the 40 year old women!!!

[Sanghai lily]

things like 40 year old guys or older hitting on teenagers or women in their early twenties is just wrong to me

Well it really depends on the individuals right?

I am now 26 years old, and my husband is 42, and we got married when I was 21... Many see this relationship as a problematic one, but in reality it is not. As long there is love and understanding, there's no problem...

[cool]

Originally Posted by Sanghai lily

Well it really depends on the individuals right?

I am now 26 years old, and my husband is 42, and we got married when I was 21... Many see this relationship as a problematic one, but in reality it is not. As long there is love and understanding, there's no problem...

Whow! Lily! I guess you're a real life example of what we're all taking about... good for you that you found love! It is an illusive thing for a lot of people.

[gummy]

It also depends on the TYPE of guy in question D= pretty much all the guys I know, even the older ones, are gamer nerds/otakus, and they've probably never been laid D= Sure they can play their h-games and watch their hentai, and say perverted stuff to you >.<" but that doesnt mean that they're bad people =/ (nothing wrong with being a pervert o.o yaoi<3) Just because a guy is older doesnt mean theyre only in it for the sex, they're still people, and they might you know, actually LIKE/LOVE you? come on people, its a beautiful world out there =< (or maybe i'm just naive/crazy -.-) love has no boundaries! ;[

also, young girls can be sexy too =o kind of like how beauty is in the eye of the beholder

I find it really disgustingly creepy when my math teacher hits on all the girls in class though =.= he's like old... and has that creepy crazy look... and cant teach for shit =< (alot of girls found my old math teacher hot though, he was 26 and blond haired blue eyed =])

[pinkhaireddreamboy]

^ Of course! It completely depends on the situation/individual people..

[cool]

Originally Posted by gummy

Ooooo.... I love this picture! That's what love ought to be...!

[v4victory]

Originally Posted by cool

When a woman matures, and gets her curves, nature dictates that she becomes attractive to men. It's nature. Once upon a time, our grandparents' grandparents got married at about 13-14. And I mean, almost everyone does at that age. What makes it un-acceptable today is our culture and upbringing, and it has nothing to do with nature.

My feeling is that 99% of guys would find a girl who's matured (by nature's standards) to be attractive. So, I guess we can say all guys are pervs in today's culture.

LOL!
I meant old men are pervs who give such comments on girls who are even of their grand daughter's age.

[v4victory]

Originally Posted by cool

On yet another note: Did you know that Sai Baba, the self-proclaim god-incarnate in India, with millions of followers, molests young boys? and the thing is their parents (most of them anyways), thinks it's ok because he's a god and god knows best! Now, he's a perv, and the parents are pervs too!

wht?
I am from India but I haven't heard about this before and I just remembered that I was small when I saw on TV some protests happening against him and some people even tried to kill him.

I don't know much about him because he has followers in particular in two states of India and at other places people consider him as fraud not GOD so I also think he is a fraud. And if what you are saying is true then yes I agree he as well as those parents are pervs.

I just wanted to make one thing clear. The self-proclaim god-incarnate you are talking about is called Satya Sai Baba, not Sai Baba. He just claims to be rebirth of the GOD Sai Baba so he is called Satya Saibaba by his followers otherwise his real name is something else.

[lilgagi88]

Blah, young girls and.. older.. older type of guys together scares me O_O it's like.. father and daughter? yucky :O and then Iono, I hate being around old men ._. they just scare me >.> lol. But if the girl really wants to be with the guy then.. no problem, as long as it's not me XD...?

[cool]

Originally Posted by v4victory

wht?
I just wanted to make one thing clear. The self-proclaim god-incarnate you are talking about is called Satya Sai Baba, not Sai Baba. He just claims to be rebirth of the GOD Sai Baba so he is called Satya Saibaba by his followers otherwise his real name is something else.

Ah, thanks for the great illumination. I get it now.