Just Say Anything!

[Dutchie]

I went to abunai! (anime-con) it was my first time and I love it!! I'll post the whole story + lots of pictures later on!! (I never felt so normal in my entire life being there!!)

while I was at the karaoke I was called. it was my 'best friend' (which I don't like anymore) I still didn't call her back. I feel guilty for not telling her that she isn't my best friend but I just can't

[AmyLou]

waru - lol, whenever I eat, I never feel full if you get me..? Ah well, I feel better now.

Jessi - Yah, I take Textiles ^^ I'm desperate to be a fashion designer. It's such hard work and can make you so stressed (our class is frantic! everyone just runs around trying to do as much as possible) but I love the designing bit. And when you've finished what you set out to make, it's awesome

[Kavi]

BubbleTea,
I really feel you with going downhill in school. i had the worst two years of my life in sophomore and junior year of high school. i was the failure in my family (a family of 6 kids!). It felt really bad to have gone from being a good/decent student to being the failure in everyone's eyes. Everybody thought i went downhill JUST because I was lazy and didn't WANT to try or just didn't CARE. It started out from me feeling like I couldn't do it all, like all the school work was just too much and i procrastinated and couldn't get BACK on top. Then when my parents and siblings started to say I just didn't care or want to succeed, it was said SO much that i started to believe it and it started to BE.

I think you can do it! You can succeed in what you do, but since you say you lost your passion for art, it seems like art isn't what you want to do? If it isn't what you really want and you don't have the same passion for it, maybe you'd rather be doing something else that you can get more into and be excited about it. If you're not excited about something or love doing it, then no wonder you feel like you're not doing good in it. I'm not saying give up on art because clearly there's a part of you that loves it or else you wouldn't have gone into it in the first place. :] but maybe you should figure out if you really want to continue pursuing art or go into something a little more exciting for you. If it feels wrong, then there's something wrong.
I have faith that you'll be okay in whatever you choose to do ^-^

But man, whoever posted on YOUR LJ is a jerk. You can't pay attention to those kinds of people.. nobody can tell you who you are but you and you should be able to complain ALL you want in your own journal without people attacking you, it's so pointless what he/she was saying XP

[BubbleTea]

thanks Kavi!

*sigh*
yeah. for me the whole main reason was because of my potetential-boyfriend-but-was-a-backstabber Devin. It's been a long time since I had a huge crush on someone, and I wasted all of my time and energy just to be with him. I sacrificed my grades because of that. I spent a whole year on getting him to notice me and to like me, and when he finally did, he couldn't wait. so we went back to his ex-girlfriend, who was also my FRIEND. I was happy for them to be back together since they were the original couple, but I felt betrayed in a way. He never told me who he was going out with. Instead I had to find out on my own and ask him on AIM. What an ass, leaving me hanging like that.

not like I care anymore anyway. once he stopped liking me, his real side started showing. he's more lazy than ever and has a nasty personality.


anyway.
I can't really I've completely lost my passion for art. I just didn't like the workload that was coming to me. and then there's the tendency that I always have to compare myself to my peers. they're more art nerds than I am and they draw a lot even if we're not assigned something. as for myself...3 summers have passed, and I haven't drawn a lot over these these summers while my peers already have a good enough portfolio to take with them to art college.

I used to want art to be my career. but then my parents, being the realists and practical people, say that art is just a waste of money and I won't make any out of being an artist. they've convinced me enough to not go to art college. ehh. as if I have a strong portfolio anyway.

so I'm just going to make art as a hobby, and I think it's just better off that way. I can't handle the demands and deadlines and would rather work on my own time, so there's no way I'm going to work for a design firm or whatever. I'm just going to be a freelance artist.

but I do want to go back to piano. I've been wanting to take piano lessons again, and will do so after high school.


I think I know who posted those comments on my LJ. I know it's someone in my class, because only someone in my class would know about the foreshorted leg assignment and the object-to-object transformation assignment.

im really sad and disappointed that no one has replied to any of my threads. and this my very first time joining a forum......

[BubbleTea]

Originally Posted by nekonkai22

im really sad and disappointed that no one has replied to any of my threads. and this my very first time joining a forum......

just wait patiently. AsiaJam forums isn't a fast moving forum for we don't have 15,000+ members.

and I replied in one of your topics btw.

[diadori]

Originally Posted by nekonkai22

im really sad and disappointed that no one has replied to any of my threads. and this my very first time joining a forum......

don't worry.
my first thread ever at asiajam didn't get a SINGLE reply for four months.
and when i responded to the poster, she didn't post back.
i was a little upset, but i just said 'no one has an opinion on this, oh well!'.
just keep posting, it gets more fun as you go along.

[BubbleTea]

Kavi,

that guy replied to my LJ again. Also, another person replied too.

click here. not again!

geez, I wonder how he even found out about my Xanga--crap! I remember tagging my "dad is crying" (he didn't even cry! He was FURIOUS and yelled at me A LOT. I don't know how the person came up with such an idea. maybe just to attack me) post with words like 'psychology', 'emotions', etc. and when he was searching posts that relate to those words, he probably found my posts that way.

but man! to think that he read more than just that post. I mean he couldn't have found my LJ if he didn't read my latest xanga entry, cuz in my latest xanga entry I stated that I was moving over to LJ because that's where most of my friends blog now, and I posted my link to my new LJ.

great. now I have to go and lock up my xanga on private. ugggh.
I feel terrible again.
I hate being so sensitive at times though, but at the same time, I don't like people who are too condescending. I mean this guy doesn't even know me well! And to think that he read a lot of my Xanga entries (and finds them "whiny, stupid, and immature for a 17 year old girl"...) He's already starting to creep me out.

Dx!
And to also think that this same person is in my art class.

and as for that other guy...man, he makes these questions so hard. why does he care so much about my future plans? psh he doesn't even know me that well. he must hate people like me who don't like making decisions too early or change their minds too early. uggh he doesn't even know me! sheesh and not everyone is the same either.

I didn't tell the guy this, but you know what, I'm just going to give this whole college/future plans up to the Lord (yes I am spiritual/religious). I don't understand why this guy is so concerned about my future plans. He isn't God, so why should I care about what he says to me? he makes answering those questions of his so...alksdbleeh. jeez why does he care so much about my life, all the successes and mistakes that I've made so far without even knowing me? Does he want me out of this art high school so bad just because of what I posted? I said I'm staying, and it's too late to even switch back to my zoned school. I'm going to to whatever it takes to do my best in art class.

[strawbie_cream]

@ BubbleTea: maybe you should friend-lock your posts on livejournal? like only putting the less-personal ones on public? but i totally agree with you, these people are sounding super creepy... they need to find something better to do with their lives other then trashing people they know almost nothing about.

[BubbleTea]

Originally Posted by strawbie_cream

@ BubbleTea: maybe you should friend-lock your posts on livejournal? like only putting the less-personal ones on public? but i totally agree with you, these people are sounding super creepy... they need to find something better to do with their lives other then trashing people they know almost nothing about.

I know right!
I did put my posts on friend-lock. I just have to keep that certain post on public so that those two people can see my replies to their comments.

[redpixie]

fire alarms at quarter to 8 in the morning, when you only got to bed at half 3....god it's cold when you've just hurled yourself out of bed and out into 'fresh air' that quick and that early.

NOT AMUSED.

[BonBonBarbie]

bubbletea, i feel so awful for you. these people are clearly pathetic and just ignore them, but i know its easier said than done.
your blogs are for your use, you can rant in them, talk about whatever you want, hell you can even write petry in them if you want. its not up to these pathetic people, who clearly have nothing better to do than to sit at home criticizing another persons journal entry, to decide what you do or do not include.
at least know that you are a nice person and so are clearly 100000000X better than them.
hope youre okay soon


p.s; bet they couldnt satisfy a woman if they tried.

[BubbleTea]

thanks BonBonBarbie!
hehe yeah, maybe that's why!

[aFineFrenzy]

^Jeez does that guy have nothing better to do? Do you know who he actually is in your class? Maybe you could talk to him face to face about it ^^;

[BubbleTea]

^ I guess so.
actually, I'm not really sure now if this person is in my class. it may be, and it may be someone I very much do not expect to be mean. everyone in my class is nice in general, but then again I don't know everyone that well. ehh. I'm not interested in talking to the person. it will feel awkward too. and actually, that person should be the one to talk to me first since he/she initiated it, and doesn't even have the courage to say it to me in real life on how terrible my piece looked. he/she could have said it right after the class critique time.

well that's only one person that doesn't like my art piece. I know it's not my best piece, the others liked it or thought it was okay and gave me tips on improving my piece. sheesh and it wasn't like I used lined paper! >__> I used origami paper as my background (my piece shows a box transforming into a crane in 5 stages).

hmm. the person replied again: "I am going to write this again: by putting your words online to be viewed publicly you are putting both yourself and your words up for criticism and there is no need to get defensive about your freedom to write whatever you want to write when i am only exercising the right you have given me to criticize what you've written here and you as well.
You'll be happy (or maybe I am right about your thirst for attention and drama and you will be disappointed) to read that I am not going to waste any more of my time on someone who is so immature as to delete a post/comment during a discussion over the internet."

what the heck I don't remember deleting any post/comment on my LJ, unless this person meant somewhere else. If this person meant my post about how my dad was yelling at me cuz I pissed him off...uhh, I deleted that weeks ago. Man, this person must be some crazy scary stalker. oh well. I'm not even going to bother with it anymore. I don't care for attention and I hate drama. this person seems to be the one that's causing all the drama, especially on something that I didn't even delete. and plus he/she even had his/her friend come over and talk crap on my LJ post on how to dictate my life decisions. errgh I didn't even want any of this to happen. I really just wish that everything went normal as usual...but this just had to happen.

actually I do remember receiving in my LJ mail that a comment was deleted, but I never even got to see the comment, so I never deleted it. ^ I found out about that reply through my regular e-mail (I have e-mail updates enabled), and I guess this person deleted his/her comment.

well whatever. this person doesn't even know me well anyway.

[MerryHappy]

i have the flu

[Kavi]

BubbleTea

WOW that person is SO rude! I can't believe they care so much about what you said enough to take the time to hate on you for it. I don't understand that mentality.
It actually seems like this person would be in your class or something, or at least in your school cuz they saw your xanga and LJ and why would they do that if you were some random girl from no where?

I had an ex bf who was in art college in San Francisco and he's a really good artist and was really good with Maya and Photoshop and stuff, but even when he graduated he still didn't know what to do with art. I think art majors are just extremely hard to succeed in altogether. o.o
he even did good landscapes and buildings and stuff too. I'm guessing you just have to be really really ambitious to succeed to your expectations in that field.. considering expectations are relatively high.

You should definitely take up piano. It's SO much fun! And it's actually pretty easy once you get the hang of it. It's just a matter of how long it takes you to learn each song. Thats also a really hard profession though, I recommend it as something extra.

<3

You remind me of my sister